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Non-sequitur
2005-09-28 - 9:02 a.m.Today takes the cake for the oddest of mornings.
For instance, today I saw an anti-abortion activist standing two blocks from my office with one of those awful signs and a tee shirt that said “Jesus” in the middle of the Pepsi symbol. I guess the man that forgave the women at the well, and Mary Magdalene is the choice of a new generation of assholes or something.
Not that I think Abortion is great or anything. In Bytonia, it would be banned. But in America, I’m down with the Right to Choose. It isn’t my body, or life…anyway, before we get sidetracked on that derailement…
Odd moment #2, Kim and I saw Rhinnanon of Berra for the first time in months crossing the street by Kim’s building. She must work nearby. It’s funny since she and Kim used to work in the same building a year or so ago.
#3 The Homeless/Underemployed guy I saw wearing a tee shirt with the “No” symbol with the word “Job” in the middle. Talk about making a bold life statement. That’s truth in advertising. Imagine going for an interview with that shirt on…”No thanks, I’m not really interested in the job, just the free coffee….you got an Skinny and Sweet?” (Extra bonus points if you know what movie “Skinny and Sweet” comes from….)
While walking past a co-workers van (looking out for Poo deposits) I see a Banana and a large Spoon lying on top of it. A little weird that he forgot the banana and the spoon? Sure. Totally in line with the rest of this morning, you betcha!
#5 Takes the cake. As we are driving in this morning I see someone has written in the dust on the back of a passing tractor-trailer the absolute geekiest graffiti I have ever seen. It said:
F=MA
Gravity
It’s the LawI think The Great Spaghetti Monster (http://www.venganza.org/spreadword.htm)in the Sky is sending me a message.
“Don’t take yourself so seriously or you could end up like this assjack holding up a sign with human chicken livers on the front. That guy’s chances of scoring? ZERO. Don’t be that guy!!!”
“It’s a small world, afterall”
“In an act of great benevolence, I will now mark all the useless dirtbags of the universe with signs that will tell you of their approach so that you may avoid them. For instance, Heralds will have a No symbol with large soapy scrub-brush on the front.”
“Eat more potassium stupid! Charge into battle fearlessly, like the Tick. SPOON!!!’
“Suck the sore wrist up and keep using the heavier sword. Cowboy up Sparkie!!!”
Thank you, oh Saucy one! I have truly been touched by your noodily appendages! Amen.
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