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No, not quite there yet...
2005-11-10 - 9:12 a.m.I’m especially stuffy today, and very, very itchy. Bleck. I can’t wait for all the damn leaves to fall off the trees and be done with poisoning me for a year.
Today is my dad’s 70 birthday. While that sorta freaked me out a couple of months ago, I’m happy about it now. There is something comforting about it. No one wants to see their folks grow old, forgetful, and then die, but it happens to us all. I just want to make sure I invest the time I have left with them wisely. They are amazing, generous people and I love them very much.
Man, I really do feel like crap today. Upbeat, but sick. I can’t seem to get a break health wise.
Tonight I swear that I will not stay up late, nor drink martinis, nor anything else fun that is making it hard for me to sleep. I guess 9 am is too early for a nap, no?
Jehan resurrected the Cry the Bans thread on the PoC board of the Armour Archive the other day, and I spent some time reading it and remembering. Amazing time in my life.
Now, I’m just coasting along. I was hoping that the trip to Texas would spark something off in me, get me out of this funk, but it just didn’t seem to do that much. I’m back, and the world has settled into it’s gray routine.
I had this near-epiphany yesterday about grief and letting it turn your life into a perpetual state of mourning, and how that is so totally not what life is suppose to be about…then I took a nap and the feeling of peace and understanding floated away.
I was going to stay in the office today and watch the minutes tick off, but we have a number of office supplies that I really need to get for the guys today. So I will get out in the sunshine. I think I will leave right at noon too. Something to look forward to.
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